INDIANA CHECK-IN VOLUME 5, ISSUE 1

INDIANA CHECK-IN

Volume 5, Issue 1 "..spiritual progress, not spiritual perfection.." Jan - Feb 1999

THE YEAR 1998 IN REVIEW

The Indiana-brand of 12 Step sexual addiction recovery presented a healthy picture this past year. There was a mixture of something old and something new. There was a lot of spiritual renewal and a move toward strong maintenance programs. It was a good year for development and growth.

Here is a partial list of what made this year memorable:

Bloomington orchestrated a 300 piece USPS mailing.
Anderson began a meeting within the Pendleton Correctional Institute Facility
Only women's meeting folded and the long-time Saturday night meeting ended.
Wednesday Night created a library and Sunday Mens' meeting revamped its library program.
Book Order Program stabilized and demonstrated strong growth.
ISO retracted their offer to hold the 1999 Convention in Indianapolis and instead moved it to Los Angeles.
CrossRoads of Independence raised nearly $4,000 toward hosting the 1999 ISO convention and then after the retraction meticulously returned donors' contributions.
200 newly revised Newcomer's Packets were published.
ISO Literature committee asked IISAA for use of information from the 1996 Sponsorship Workshop.
Rainbow Book and Star/News ads continued.
IISAA's status with RCA and CoSA moved to strictly "interfellowship".
Wabash Valley Correctional Institute asked Bloomington for a meeting in their facility.
Marion County Jail meeting moved from Monday to Thursday nights and celebrated 5 years of service.
3 year study revealed telephone answering volunteers processed an average of 1,500 calls per year. For the first time, the volunteer training manual was revised.
Elizabeth S.'s pamphlet for women in SAA was published by the ISO.
IISAA Booths were present at both major Indianapolis gay civic events.
For the first time, Sunday Morning Men's meeting welcomed adolescent males to their meetings.
E-mail and WWW sites were established.
At ISO's request their logo and words "Sex Addicts Anonymous" was removed from IISAA's WWW site.
Check-In celebrated 4 years and was added to the web site.
The Holiday celebration and the picnic both celebrated seven continuous years.
Fall Retreat was 4 years old.
The '98 Spring Workshop rated a 4.14 on a 1-5 scale by its participants and it celebrated its 3rd year.
Monthly average Intergroup attendance was 11 representatives per meeting.
Financial contributions to IISAA increased.
For the first time, since their inception, the IISAA Bylaws were amended.
For the first time, an operating budget and quarterly financial reports were issued.

Even though this list does not represent all that was accomplished, it does exemplify what donated time and hard work can do Credit goes to the dedicated service workers in Indiana. Without them, the successes in 1998 would not have been possible.

From the Editor . . .

Happy 1999, SAA members!

It is rare that one gets to witness the "time events" that are about to unfold this year. The ends of a year, a decade and a millennium are before us. Without doubt, the experiences will be unique and full of awe.

Likewise, we are in a singular experience as recovering sex addicts. Twenty-five years ago no such condition as sex addiction was considered a possibility. Yet, here we are working together, using the 12 Steps, to overcome a condition that not only plagues us but has plagued our families for generations.

There is satisfaction when realizing we are the generation offered this special recovery gift. We pray our higher powers will help us wisely step along this path.

Armed with the lessons learned from 12 Step recovery, may we continue our onward journey of healing. In unison and love, may we join our hearts and minds. Let's reassure ourselves that this amazingly spiritual program will not falter. Let's proudly march into 1999 and beyond.

Love and Peace,
Bill S., Editor

A LETTER TO INTERGROUP

Dear fellow SAA members:

Greetings! My name is Joel, a grateful recovering sex addict, and a member of SAA here in Eugene. I'm one of a few people here that is active in intergroup. Anyway, the reason why I'm writing this letter to your fellowship is to ask some questions about outreach, in particular outreach to the gay community during "pride festivals". We're a small fellowship here in Eugene and we're managing pretty well, but I would also like to do some outreach not only to be an active participant in my own recovery at the group level but to do outreach as a form of amends to the people I've acted out with. I've done outreach with the facilities which provide HIV testing, and I would now like to look at doing outreach at our next gay pride festival here in Eugene.

Some questions: How was this outreach approved by your fellowship? Is it still within Traditions? My only concern so far is proposing this idea to my fellowship--and God-willing they accept it. But I want to do my homework first before I pitch it to the group. Are there any special concerns that I'm not aware of at this point that I should be? As for my own safety, I will have my partner present who would also like to do outreach for COSA. And other group members may or may not want to join in on this particular service work--most everyone in my fellowship feels comfortable taking baby steps right now.

I would be grateful for a reply from members who have done this particular service work. I'll look forward to hearing from you. Thank you so much for your time and attention. And thank you for the newsletter. It's great!

Sincerely,

Joel
Eugene SAA Intergroup
P.O. Box 24931
Eugene, OR 97402-0432

GREAT CELEBRATION!

Three dozen members of SAA and CoSA gathered together on December 12th to celebrate the year end holidays. They met at the Hermitage Retreat Center in Indianapolis. This annual gathering encouraged the sharing of joy and serenity. This year's event was a wonderful experience. The beautiful location, the warm atmosphere, the fine food and the warm, wonderful people added up to a memorable occasion.

FIRST-TIME FOR BYLAWS

For the first time since their creation in 1994, the IISAA bylaws have been amended. The changes include:

changing the SAA acronym to IISAA.
changing the acronym NSO to ISO.
revising the guideline for monthly intergroup meetings.
changing the criterion for signing checks.
redefining the relationship between SAA and other 12-Step recovery groups.
Board member position added to oversee literature development and growth.

AUDITOR(S) SOUGHT

Volunteers are needed to verify IISAA's financial records. If you are an interested, please contact this newsletter.

DOORS KEPT OPEN

Bill J. reports that the Friday Night North meeting kept scheduled meeting times and offered meetings on Christmas Day and New Year's Day. The good news is the meetings attracted five and six members respectively.

We dance round in a ring and suppose,
But the Secret sits in the middle and knows.
- - - Robert Frost

WILLINGNESS

Have a true desire from within your heart to change.
Be teachable.
I know examples help, I'll try to set a good one.

Accept that pain may be a prerequisite.
Jump on the times when willingness peaks, to take positive action.

Don't pray daily for specific works, just for God's will.
Steel oneself for the highest tides, the battle does not need to be uphill.

For if you do, the flowing tides of compulsion will ebb.
You will begin to choose actions that reduce risk.

Rich W.

INTERFELLOWSHIP NEWS

RECOVERING COUPLES ANONYMOUS

RCA deals with the issues of committed relationships using the 12-steps as a guide. There are currently three meetings in central Indiana. They meet in Bloomington, Plainfield, and Indianapolis. The Bloomington and Indianapolis groups are open only to those in sexual addiction or sexually co-dependent recovery. The Plainfield group is open to all couples as long as they attend a 12-step recovery program. Please email if you would like more info.

CODEPENDENTS OF SEX ADDICTS

This 12-step group encourages the personal recovery of the sex addict's spouse, friends, and family members. There are several meeting in central Indiana. For information, you may email or call 317-545-9783.

J U S T A T H O U G H T

"What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step. It is always the same step, but you have to take it."
--- Antoine De Saint-Exupery

"Sooner or later, you start taking yourself seriously. You know when you need a break. You know when you need a rest. You know what to get worked up about, and what to get rid of. And you know when it's time to take care of yourself, for yourself. To do something that makes you stronger, faster, more complete. Because you know it's never too late to have a life. And never too late to change one. Just do it."
---Ad for Nike Shoes

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IISAA 1999 Intergroup Meetings

February 13 Canary Cafe, Ft. Wayne & Alabama Sts.
March 13 Indianapolis, IN (4 - 6 p.m.)
April 10

IISAA 4th Annual One-Day Workshop (see below for registration info)
May 1 Christ United Methodist Church - Indianapolis

MEN'S CHRISTIAN RETREAT
January, 29-31, 1999 John XXIII Center, Hartford City

MiCHIGAN RETREAT
March 19, 20 & 21, 1999 Colombiere Ctr, Clarkston MI

ANNUAL IISAA FALL RETREAT
October 29-30, 1999 Camp PYOCA, Brownstown IN

BOOK REVIEW

ANSWERS IN THE HEART
( Daily Meditations for Men and Women Recovering from Sex Addiction)
by PW and SK

Do you need an excellent meditation book. Here is a book for examination. There are thoughtful and inspirational meditations for every day of the year. Each one reflects the power of the sexual addiction healing process. Obviously, the anonymous authors have experienced recovery first-hand. They share from the heart. This is the meditation book recommended for everyone in a sexual addiction 12-Step recovery program.

MOVIE REVIEW

The Country Girl (1954)
Bing Crosby, Grace Kelly, William Holden

Here is an in-depth look at a relationship between an addict and codependent. The story of a recovering alcoholic and his struggling wife is a powerful character study. Although somewhat dated, there is no loss of the sadness or pain inflicted by addiction. Oscars went to Kelly and the screen adaptation. The film's message is clear and the presentation is unforgettable. Its portrayal of the subject is one of the best ever from Hollywood.

"People talking without speaking,
People hearing without listening,
People writing songs that voices never share, and no one dare disturb the Sound of Silence."

Simon & Garfunkel,
Sounds of Silence

TRAVELING WITH SHAME
A ONE DAY WORKSHOP

"Shame is the most disturbing emotion we ever experience directly about ourselves, for in the moment of shame we feel deeply divided from ourselves. Shame is like a wound made by an unseen hand, in response to defeat, failure or rejection. At the same moment that we feel most disconnected, we long to embrace ourselves once more, to feel reunited. Shame divides us from ourselves, just as it divides us from others, and because we still yearn for reunion, shame is deeply disturbing."

"...To experience shame is to feel seen in a painfully diminished sense. Our eyes turn inward in the moment of shame, and suddenly we've become impaled under the magnifying gaze of our own eyes. Even when other people are present and watching, we are watching ourselves; but we actually mistake the watching eyes as belonging only to others. Exposure is what we feel in the instant shame strikes: Our face burns hot, we blush, we lower our head or eyes, yearn to disappear, to escape all those watching eyes, to find cover. But we can never hide from ourselves."

Coming Out of Shame
Gershen Kaufman and Lev Raphael

The 4th annual IISAA Spring One-Day Workshop will be dedicated to examining the relationship between shame and sexual addiction recovery. There will be panel discussions, interactive workshops, personal stories and much more.

The workshop will be held on May 1, 1999 at the beautiful and spacious Christ United Methodist Church located at 8540 US 31 South, Indianapolis, Indiana.

Registration will begin at 8:30 a.m. The workshop will begin promptly at 9:00 a.m. and end at approximately 4:00 p.m. Lunch will be provided (a vegetarian lunch will be included as part of the menu).

The cost to attend will be $10 for early bird registrations (those postmarked prior to April 10,1999) and $12.50 for those registrations postmarked after April 10, 1999 and on the day of the workshop.

To register for the workshop please submit the following:

Name:________________________________________

Address:______________________________________

City:________________State:________Zip:__________

Name as you would like it to appear on your name badge

______________________________________________

Mail the above information along with the appropriate registration fee to:
IISAA
Attn: Workshop 1999
PO Box 20834
Indianapolis, IN 46220

Inquiries may be made by calling 317-545-9783 or by email.

The Indiana Check-In is a bimonthly publication of the IISAA. It provides the Check-In, free of charge, to Indiana SAA members and others upon request. Send contributions or inquiries:

Check- In
P.O. Bx 20834
Indpls., IN 46220
Telephone: (317) 545-9783
FAX: (317)-783-0064
E-Mail: iisaa@nolda.pair.com
WWW: http://www56.pair.com/iisaa